"The End" lyrics - BLUE OCTOBER

Here alone, standing barefoot in our lawn
Worms squeezing their way through my toes
Tonight, that's how it goes
I'm at your window, kneeling quiet
I thought at least I'd maybe try to get your head right
Get your heart right
"Let him go!"

Then through the glass, I see your dress fall to the floor
As he embraces every inch of you, the woman I adore
I can't believe the way you're bending
Can't believe this never ending moaning, asking him for more
Begging him for more

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home."
I have to fix this on my own

Replace my heart
'Cause I'm convinced mine broke the day I let us end
Replace my heart
I don't wanna live by coping
I'm done with hoping...
End

I crept in close enough to see
The way he touched her
From her feet across her knees
Inside her sweetest spot
He pleased and pleased her
I turned around and tried to take control
But no control was capable
It was a centerfold
Of how less than low
Can possibly go

I squeezed the life into my brain
Like pushing knives into a vein
I've gotta get
I said I've gotta get inside
So to the back window, I crawl in silent
Standing in the darkness of my living room
This used to be my home

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home."
I'm moving forward to the bedroom door

Replace my heart
'Cause I'm convinced mine broke the day I let us end
Replace my heart
I don't wanna live by coping
I'm done with hoping...
End

I turn the doorknob with two fingers
To be slow enough to sneak into the room
Among the corner darkness gloom
I had to see this happening
He pushed himself so deep inside her
Clapping rang and bounced off every wooden walled room
And that's when all went silent
Blank except for the color red
As I walked calmly, numbing, paralyzed beside the bed
I said, "I know I'm not allowed to be here
I just had to see
How good your new man really fucks you
'Cause you both been fucking me."

So now I planned this last thing
You can both do as a pair
I tie both blindfolds tight
Around your fucking eyes
To blind your stare
I don't want to alarm you
But I figured we could end this
In what seems easy quick and painless, man
So I'll get down to business
I choose you first
There's a gun
It's at your head
So laugh at me one more time
But put your face inside the bed
You sit and watch me while I do this shit
And learn from what I've said
I cocked the pistol
Pulled the trigger
And all I saw was red

How far will I go to make it feel right?
"Come home."
I have to fix this on my own

Then the screaming
Oh, the screaming
It's nice to see you scared
Of such a weak and stupid husband
Who knows you never really cared
I'll leave you with a question
That I need to hear from your head
"Was all this worth it knowing
You have just seconds left to live?

Now think about your answer
Laying face down on the bed
I cocked the pistol
Pulled the trigger
And all I saw was red
I gently stroke her arm
As she lies lifeless on her back
Then placed the barrel in my mouth
All I saw was black