I was walking down the street one day
And my mind was in a slide
When this well-dressed, all-dressed, hot dog said
"French fries on the side!"
He was golden brown and about six feet long
His bun was toasted fast
As he turned away, he did remark
"Frankfurts built to last!"
Well, my momma didn't tell me
And my poppa didn't say
This world's a busy place and time just wastes away
Brother didn't happen
And sister never stayed
Momma hardly opened
And Poppa never played
Once I came home with a brand new suit
And a charge account to boot
There was a Chevrolet sittin' on the couch with a
Cadillac ready to toot!
After drinks and conversation too
'Bout the meaning of inner need
Said you're a man for real
Yes, it's a deal
I was lying on my desk at ease
Cancelling the afternoon
When the door swung open to a fruit of the loom
Screaming, "Smoke me to the moon!"
He was a xenophobe with a .38
Besides a ruptured spleen
But I kept my cool, as he slowly drooled
Only Brand X cleans to clean