"Introducing... The Mothers (Live On "Piknik" June 18, 1970)" lyrics - FRANK ZAPPA

Jan Donkers: Hallo, [Dutch intro]. Frank, in a certain way it's surprising to see you back again because last year it was announced that The Mothers had broken up. Why did you break up the group in the first place last year?

FZ: Do you really want me to tell you or do you just want something entertaining?

Jan Donkers: Well tell me, lots of people are interested.

FZ: Well, there are a whole bunch of reasons. It may interest you to learn that the last Mothers Of Invention tour with the old personnel came out ten thousand dollars in debt at the end of the tour, that's one of the reasons. Let's hear it for The Mothers Of Invention!

The Mothers: Hooray!

Jan Donkers: Where was the tour, in America?

FZ: Yeah, it was an American tour and I must say we definitely weren't going first class any place but we just had a very high overhead, a lot of equipment to drag around and uh...

Jan Donkers: America doesn't like you probably, no?

FZ: No, no, not quite as much as here.

Jan Donkers: Aren't you concerned about your anti-American image then?

FZ: Well, not enough to be dangerous.

Jan Donkers: [Dutch translation] A lot of- Happier question, there- Why did you form another group then this year?

FZ: Oh, I thought it'd be fun.

Jan Donkers: OK.

The Mothers: Yeah! More!

FZ: Let's here it for positivity!

Jan Donkers: You gonna tour Europe but not America with this group?

FZ: No, we did a couple of jobs in the United States before we came here and we have about four more after we go back. But they are all in nice places, so... they'll be real easy.

Jan Donkers: A few years ago you told me that you were planning to live in Amsterdam for a while. What's- Have you any plans in this direction now?

FZ: Well, if, uh, they do 2- There's talk about doing 200 Motels on VPRO television and at that time I was thinking about living here for about month prior to the production of the show.

Jan Donkers: When will it be?

FZ: December, I think.

Jan Donkers: December. [Dutch translation]

FZ: It hasn't- It hasn't been set yet.

Jan Donkers: No, no, I know, I just- I said "probably."

FZ: Well, how was I to know?

Jan Donkers: Yeah, ha ha... There's another question. About this, you know, on the cover of your first album there was this quote from the man who says, "I'm gonna make you guys as big as The Turtles."

FZ: That's right.

The Mothers: Ha ha ha!

Jan Donkers: You think you're as big as The Turtles now, with two people from The Turtles in your group?

FZ: Well it helps a lot if you wanna be as big as The Turtles to have some Turtles in your band.

The Mothers: Alright, Frank! Right on, Frank, right on!

FZ: Take it away, Turtles.

Jan Donkers: If I promise you to make you as big as The Rascals now, what do you do then?

FZ: Yeah! They'll be, well I don't know, we'll get Dino Danelli on drums...

Jan Donkers: Can you please introduce the members of your group to the people and tell them what was the last group they played in?

FZ: Sure! Here they are The Turtles down here, ladies and gentlemen, Mark and Howie, in the brightly colored uniforms. Carefully concealed behind them amid the shrubbery and electronics is Ian Underwood. For- formerly of The Mothers Of Invention. Aynsley Dunbar, formerly of this blues band they used to have, Aynsley Dunbar Retaliation and- What's that other one called? The Blue Whale?

Aynsley Dunbar: The Blue Whale, yeah.

FZ: Yes, that one too. And uh, Jeffrey [Swoovette] Simmons on electrical bass who was formerly employed as the leader of a group from Seattle called The Easy Chair, ladies and gentlemen.

The Mothers: Yeah, yeah! Alright! Right on, Simmons!

FZ: And over here in the background we have George Duke! Take it away, George. George Duke records for World Pacific and he has his own ensemble known as The George Duke Trio and you may be familiar with his work with the Don Ellis Orchestra and also with Don- uh, Jean-Luc Ponty.

Jan Donkers: Oh, great, jazz violinist. Final question, your friend Captain Beefheart says he comes from Mars, where do you come from?

FZ: Well, I don't want you to hold it against me, but I come from the United States.

The Mothers: Alright!

FZ: Alright, now we're going to play a song for you called "Wonderful Wino," and it's dedicated to Mr. Duke on the piano, who's really big on the wine. Oh, yeah, should be.

?: Won't you give me an A sharp?
FZ: If The Monkees were doing this show they'd already be tuned up.
?: Who would care?
FZ: In E.
?: E-e-e-e-e
FZ: Alright, that's good enough. Here we go. Tawdriness. One, two, three, four.